New Medium Ransom Note Appears to Threaten Puppies

Michael Perman, C'EST WHAT?
2 min readFeb 24, 2022
Ransom Note, Anonymous

After my most recent story that shared ideas on how best to lure new followers with impractical bribes, I received a new ransom note that I am taking very seriously.

First, I was not aware that I owned a puppy, and not sure that “owning” is the right term since that sounds so inequitable, not that the puppy owns me but more of a sharing and co-dependent relationship is what makes sense. But, not being aware of the puppy in the first place made this most recent ransom note even more alarming.

So, I am not reaching out again to plead for help. Thanks to all of you who recently started following me because now I am close to the goal, or rather the “demand” of having 100 followers. Only need a few more and I would certainly rather have a puppy than receiving said puppy’s doodies as the note threatens. But, I am also aware that one should not negotiate with kidnappers because the demands only grow. Indeed, I am mentally preparing for the next demand — one MILLION followers.

Also, I noticed the note was signed “me”, which I presume is the secret person behind Medium, much like “Q”. I was not aware of the dark network of puppy renditions happening either. I think we need to try unveiling the secretive “me” and only a sum of more than 100 followers can do that.

Please help and if/when a new puppy emerges and is sent to me, then I would be happy to write a story about our emotional reunion. Or could even write a story about your puppy…again if that could be shipped to me for a few weeks. Just being practical.

Thank you and please stay close to your puppies, or else.



Michael Perman, C'EST WHAT?

Michael Perman is an experienced copy and short story writer who specializes in innovation, creativity, food and future trends.